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Liquor Art

by Yawning

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1.
*we're rolling Ryan.* Craigslist missed connections, Hamilton, New Jersey. For the ginger bastard who works at the Wawa off route 33. Were you always so meek and khaki? I wonder if you loved something before you killed yourself for others. If your heart ever swelled at the chance to do anything besides assimilate. You have sanded yourself into inoffensive smoothness in the pursuit of a dream. Were you not someone before then? Were you not someone before then? Were you not someone before then? Please don't kill me cause I don't have the time. I'm too busy breaking down in parking lots and shopping malls. Please don't kill me cause I don't have the time. I'm trying to figure out, figure out my own mind. "I'VE BEEN PEGGED BY MANY PEOPLE BUT NOT BY *REDACTED*." "I GOT THAT!" "I DON'T NEED MY VOICE ON ALBUM SAYING I HAVE NOT BEEN PEGGED BY MY EX GIRLFRIEND."
2.
Beach Beat 02:22
Second-hand smoke on the way home, I never thought i'd be this close to you again. I hope you know, I'm better now than I have been, And I'm alright at least for now. I smoked the whole pack on the way back home, remembering everything I said was dumb. I can't forget all the words you said, In the worst tone and I'm in bed. I'd burn the house down just to sleep at yours, I'd light the fire just to light your course. x2
3.
The bottle gets the best of me, I'm drowning in my own inconsistencies. I know you know, I'm better than this, I've been so much better than this But I'm, drowning now, I can't recall, the things i forgot how to do. I'm okay I swear. I'm alright in here. I'm just fine I swear. I'm alright out there. And I don't forget these words, inconsistency breeds hurt. And I am one, to not know how, To do simple things on a daily basis, That I can't seem to work through. It's hurting me every day but I'll still, Be better than this, Better than this, I know how, To be better than this, Better somehow. I'm better than this, I know how, I'll do it somehow, I'll do it somehow. I'm okay I swear, I'm alright in here. I'm just fine I swear. I'm alright out. I'm okay I swear. I'm alright in here. I'm just fine I swear. I'm alright out there.
4.
*so sick of this one.* I can't forget about the ways I told myself, I was another person letting you down. I won't know what I've been before But I'll remember it, when I wake up at my front door. And I don't know, about the reasons why I do, the things I do, except for you, You always seem to clue me in but that's end of it. My illness, not as lonely as it seems, Can't think straight but I'm holding at the seams. My illness, is not as lonely as it seems, I can't think straight, but i'm holding at the seams. I can't forget all the ways you forgave, It always strikes a different chord with me. But everything you said makes me feel like i'm less than i should be, But I know that that's the way that it needs to be. My illness, not as lonely as it seems. I can't think straight, but i'm holding at the seams. My illness, not as lonely as it seems. I can't think straight, but I'm holding at the seams. *I don't think that's it, no, no, just keep going.* I CAN'T FORGET I CAN'T FORGET I CAN'T FORGET I CAN'T FORGET.
5.
Skramz 03:17
I guess it's this again, Playing detective on my own blackout again, I'm fucked, I'm done, I'm in the gutter then, I'm waking up, remembering things I can't defend. I can't forget all of these empty feelings. I have so much regret, I feel it sinking deeper. I hope it hurts, That I won't remember the sound of your voice or the poems you wrote. And it works both ways this I've learned is true. I cannot spend another second looking at you, It hurts my eyes. I tried to remember the good times, but I can't remember the good times. I can't forget all of these empty feelings. I have so much regret, I feel it sinking deeper. I hope it hurts, That i won't remember the sound of your voice or the poems you wrote. *hi-hat 4 count* *twinkles* I can't forget all of these empty feelings. I have so much regret, I feel it sinking deeper. I hope it hurts, That I won't remember the sound of your voice or the poems you wrote.
6.
Free Throw 02:32
You knew all of this would turn out terribly, Cause you knew that i'd fuck up, inevitably. I hope you've learned anything from this, Taking it all in strides you're the best of it. 5 beers, 6 drinks, I'm fucked, I think. 6 beers, 8 more drinks, I'm fucked, I think. 8 beers, 9 more drinks, I'm fucked I think. 10 beers, 12 more drinks, I'm already dead, I think. I'm the one getting in the way, I always slip when I know the stakes. I hope you're better now, than how you used to be, Taking pages out of my book, drinking constantly. 5 beers, 6 drinks. I'm fucked, I think. 8 beers, 9 drinks, I'm dead, I think. 10 beers, 12 more drinks, I'm fucked, I think. You were right all along, the problems I had were mine from the start.
7.
Sat outside your house for hours, waiting for your call. Seeing if you'd speak to me at all this fall. I've been telling your lies, you know that I have, Trying to believe the things that I said. But I knew that none of this would turn out right. I know that I'm doing well but I'm better than you treat me. Holding out on myself till you realize that somehow. I'm better than you, I know that I am. I don't remember a thing that I said, But I know that I am better than I think I've been. I could tell you everything and you'd forget it just the same (x2) I could tell you everything and you'd forget it just the same (I remember this time, remember this time, I remember this time) (till end).

credits

released May 17, 2019

Jake Schwartz - Guitar
Felix Alamentero - Drums/Backing vox
Ryan Doyle - Bass/Vocals
Nick "Two Hoodies" Schenck - guest vocals

Recorded by Rick Pruden at Stoney-Hollow
Mixed by Felix Alamentero at The Foster Home
Mastered by Collin Adkisson at Black Walnut Studios

This album is dedicated to Joelle Longo (1996-2019). Without your constant love and support none of this would've ever happened. Thank you for being a beacon of hope in an otherwise hopeless world. I love you.

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Yawning Hamilton Township, New Jersey

Sadbois inc.

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